As I've discussed here on Life with Lynnie (LwL) recently, I haven't been feeling the best.
Off and on, I feel like I have more energy than I do, other days. But, generally speaking, I do not have the energy I had prior to me becoming ill in September 2012 and having that emergency surgery.
Something very different happened to me, a few weeks ago. It was something that hasn't really happened, before.
On Tuesday, October 22nd, a few weeks ago, I went to the library, just like I normally do.
Before I left to go there, I hadn't really felt well. Just as I had felt off and on for more than a week.
While driving home, I found myself feeling tired. This was in addition to having a headache, and gut pain.
By the time I reached home, I was grateful that I was able to take some time to rest. I set my cell phone alarm, and went to lay down.
I can't say to be sure, but it felt like I must have been asleep by the time my head hit the pillow.
While asleep, I felt great! Both physically and emotionally!
You see, I spent some time with my now deceased husband, Gordon. And, we saw some people rising in the air, to go to heaven.
Gordon told me that I needed to go back. I literally heard his voice., when he told me that. Then, I heard his voice, again.
When I said I didn't want to leave him, he replied in a soft and loving tone, "Lynn, you need to wake up..."
I'm sure you can guess that I woke up. Right then. Right as I had begun crying in my dream, not wanting to leave him.
Within a few seconds of waking, I found myself crying. I felt let down, that He hadn't taken me home, during my rest and dream time.
This was, after all, the first time in a very long time, that I had dreamed of Gordon. And, I hadn't wanted my time with him to end.
I found myself feeling sorry that God hadn't taken me home. To heaven. To be with Him... and with Gordon.
It wasn't easy, but I had to shake off the feeling of pain and sorrow, once again. Was this grief? I have no idea. Maybe so. Maybe not.
In any case, I had to stop feeling troubled. So I prayed.
I was reminded of John 14:1-3, "Let not your heart be troubled: ye believe in God, believe also in me.
2 In my Father's house are many mansions: if it were not so, I would have told you. I go to prepare a place for you.
3 And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again, and receive you unto myself; that where I am, there ye may be also."
God knows I believe in Him. And, because I do, I try to keep my eyes on Him, rather than spend my life feeling troubled.
How grateful I am to Him, for making promises to us, His children.
How grateful I am that He has gone and prepared a place for me. And, for all who believe upon our Lord, Jesus Christ.
How thankful I am that one day, He'll come and take me home. Home, to heaven.
But, for now... I'm here on earth. Even so, home is where the heart is.
Until next time...
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