Saturday, October 5, 2013

No Thoughts...

As I've mentioned here on Life with Lynnie (LwL), it's been a stressful week.  Not just due to what I've discussed, previously.

There's been other issues.  More personal issues.  And health issues.

None of which I truly want to discuss here on LwL.

I will say that I am grateful to my friends for their loving support.  And, to my daughter P, who has been very supportive of me. 

My close friends knew that I wasn't doing well on Thursday.  The day when they knew I saw the newest Windsor surgeon, who is replacing my pre-existing Windsor surgeon who felt he wasn't qualified to help me, or the Toronto surgeon, with my upcoming surgery.

It seems they all recognized that things didn't go well.  Especially, when I didn't contact them and update them, immediately.

Unfortunately, they were right.

I must admit, that on my way home after my medical appointment, and after dropping my daughter P off at her home, my mind began spinning.  By the time I was half-way home, I felt like I might pass out.

The shock of what I heard at that appointment, totally threw me for a loop.

Prayer didn't stop.  But, instead of praying for healing through medical assistance, I prayed differently.

I prayed that God would provide a miracle healing for me.  Or, take me home, so that I wouldn't have to suffer any more.

Each one of my loving friends reached out to me, with love.  And, prayed... even though I told each of them that I couldn't discuss the latest development, concerning my health and the care I need.

Finally, I found myself able and calm enough to update my friends.  A couple through telephone calls.  Another couple through messaging on Facebook (FB).  And, through one who invited me to go to dinner with her.

For an early dinner on Friday at Red Lobster, my friend A and I met. 

Together, we enjoyed a delicious meal.  There was no way I could eat the whole thing, so I brought some home with me.  Thank you, A.  I am truly thankful to you, for inviting me and treating me.  Next time, it's my turn!

Even though I informed A, as to what transpired and what the outcome was, of my surgery being delayed once again, I made sure to let her know that I am truly grateful that God is in control.  And, not me.

I let her, as well as all my other friends know, that there was no use even thinking about or discussing the horribleness of the day with the newest Windsor surgeon, for nothing would change the situation.  Or, the outcome.

Over and over again, I thought of Matthew 6:34, "Take therefore no thought for the morrow: for the morrow shall take thought for the things of itself. Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof."

Yes, there is no point in thinking about what will happen tomorrow, or whenever it is that I may finally receive the surgery I need.  There is enough to think about, today.

Being the first (1st) Friday of the month, I later met with my group of single Christians at Tim Horton's (TH).  Once again, I was asked how I made out at my medical appointment.

Giving them the basic information, was upsetting to me.  But, even as I spoke, I confirmed to them, that I am not going to think about how the situation will work itself out.  Or, become upset over my surgery being delayed, again.

It's upsetting to me that in USA, a relative of one of my friends found out they had an abscess and was operated on immediately, because it is an unhealthy and dangerous health problem.  I was happy for them.  But, unhappy for me.

Yes, it's upsetting to me, because not only do I have an abscess, but I also have active MRSA, and it seems no one here in Canada, cares.  I've been waiting months and will continue to wait almost indefinitely for the surgery I should have had a long time, ago.

I'm not in control.  God is.  And, we are living in a truly evil world.  One that I cannot change.

I will take life one day at a time.  And, look to Him, for everything.  Just as I always do.

And, thank Him... even for this devastating trial of my life being at risk.  How the trial ends, is totally in God's hands.  I'm trusting Him.


Until next time...

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