In yesterday's Life with Lynnie (LwL) entry, I wrote about what happened at my surgeon/doctor's appointment. The one where I found out the results of the CT Scan I had, showed nothing.
As I mentioned yesterday, I didn't really trust the test results from the CT Scan I had a few weeks ago.
I realize that some of you may be wondering why I would say that. And, why I wouldn't be trustworthy of our healthcare system, here in Ontario, Canada.
For starters, if you've read the book I authored, Love Never Fails You... you would know that while our socialized medical system is good, in my opinion it is broken. It's broken when people cannot get the care they need. Or, when they cannot get the care they need, when they need it. I refer to this, as the Glass Wall.
However, there are other reasons I do not trust the test results reported to me, yesterday.
Medicine, is big business. One of the biggest business in our country and possibly even around the world.
There are many people who go into medicine because they are drawn to it, and due to being suitable for the position. I congratulate those who have opted to become educated and work in the field of their dreams, for the right reasons.
However, not everyone does this. Not everyone wants employment in the medical field, for the right reasons. Some are only there to put their eight (8) hours in, and get paid in a big way, trusting that people will never stop being in need of medical assistance.
Okay. You're probably thinking ill of me for writing what I just wrote. But, I believe this is true. For many reasons.
While I have no intention about writing about every medical trial in my life, I will have to tell you about one instance that assured me that our medical system is defective, in more ways than just the Glass Wall. I'll try to keep it simple and short, without going into much detail.
As a teenager, I complained to my doctor about a lump that kept appearing from time to time. It wasn't a case where it was there all the time. It would swell up at times when the doctor didn't want to examine me. Later, it would disappear.
This went on year after year. Every town/city I lived in, where I had a new physician, I brought this problem to their attention. Nothing was ever found. Nor was anything ever done to provide healing for me.
Then, when I was in my early 30's, it swelled up so large, I could hardly sit. My now deceased husband, Gordon took me to the Emergency Room (ER) at the hospital.
There the ER doctor examined me, and told me it was a large cyst. He also told me he would lance it, and clean it out.
As he began cleaning it out, he counted aloud. "It's the size of one (1) golf ball", he said. Then, he went on counting. When he reached seven (7), he exclaimed that there was far more than he thought and wouldn't continue counting. Several minutes later, he explained that unless he took me into a proper operating room for surgery, he wouldn't be able to clean it out, fully.
So, he packed me and sent me home. I was directed to meet him the following day at the other hospital. I did this. And, had surgery.
Afterwards, he was rather upset with me. He told me it was the largest cyst he had ever seen. He commented that I must have had this for many years.
Continuing on, he condemned me for never having seen a doctor about this in the past. It was then, that I made it clear that for approximately 14 or more years, I had complained to every doctor I had ever seen.
And, I let him know that only six (6) weeks earlier, I had an ultrasound test done with this regard. And, the results showed there was nothing wrong. Nothing was found. Nothing...
His demeanor totally changed. Instead of being upset with me, he calmly commented that the ultrasound technician must have been looking for something small, and not something large.
Hmmm... this came to mind, when I thought about the CT Scan results saying there was nothing wrong. That nothing showed up.
So, if you were wondering why I was so upset yesterday, maybe you can understand better now, after reading about how I suffered for many, many years with our medical system that truly let me down, leaving me open to suffering for an unnecessary extended period of time.
Please know that I am not fearful. I know that God is with me. And, I realize that this is just one of many tests I have endured in my lifetime.
This reminds me of Isaiah 41:10, "Fear thou not; for I am with thee: be not dismayed; for I am thy God: I will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee; yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness."
Yes, He is with me. He is my God. He gives me strength, daily. And, I know He will help me. In His time.
Once again, I thank all who have prayed for healing for me. May God bless you.
Until next time...
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