When I awoke last Thursday morning, I not only still felt like I was grieving, but something else was strange. A song was on my mind.
Why? I have no idea. For some reason, God allows this to happen to me from time to time.
It wasn't a Christian hymn or song. It was a song by Queen. Nothing Really Matters. Also known as, Bohemian Rhapsody. Here's a Youtube link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fFzsi8YyzBg with lyrics.
After being awake for a short time, I noticed that I couldn't get some of the lyrics out of my mind. Here's the lyrics, as per www.Sing365.com
Is this the real life, is this just fantasy
Caught in a landslide, no escape from reality
Open your eyes, look up to the skies and see
I'm just a poor boy, I need no sympathy
Because I'm easy come, easy go, a little high, little low
Anyway the wind blows, doesn't really matter to me, to me
Mama, just killed a man, put a gun against his head
pulled my trigger, now he's dead, mama
Life had just begun, but now I've gone and thrown it all away
Mama, ooo, didn't mean to make you cry
If I'm not back again this time tomorrow
Carry on, carry on, as if nothing really matters
Too late, my time has come
Sends shivers down my spine, body's aching all the time
Goodbye everybody, I've got to go
Gotta leave you all behind and face the truth
Mama ooo (anyway the wind blows) I don't want to die
I sometimes wish I'd never been born at all
I see a little silhouetto of a man
Scaramouch, scaramouch - will you do the fandango
Thunderbolt and lightning very very frightening me
Gallileo, gallileo, gallileo, gallileo,
Gallileo figaro magnifico
But I'm just a poor boy and nobody loves me
(He's just a poor boy from a poor family)
(Spare him his life from this monstrosity)
Easy come easy go will you let me go
(Bismillah no we will not let you go) let him go
(Bismillah, we will not let you go) let him go
(Bismillah, we will not let you go) let me go
(Will not let you go) let me go (never)
(Never let you go) let me go, never let me go ooo
No, no, no, no, no, no, no
Oh mama mia, mama mia, mama mia let me go
Beelzebub has a devil put aside for me - for me - for me
So you think you can stone me and spit in my eye
So you think you can love me and leave me to die
Oh baby can't do this to me baby
Just gotta get out just gotta get right outta here
Ooh yeah, ooh yeah, nothing really matters, anyone can see
Nothing really matters nothing really matters to me
Anyway the wind blows...
Caught in a landslide, no escape from reality
Open your eyes, look up to the skies and see
I'm just a poor boy, I need no sympathy
Because I'm easy come, easy go, a little high, little low
Anyway the wind blows, doesn't really matter to me, to me
Mama, just killed a man, put a gun against his head
pulled my trigger, now he's dead, mama
Life had just begun, but now I've gone and thrown it all away
Mama, ooo, didn't mean to make you cry
If I'm not back again this time tomorrow
Carry on, carry on, as if nothing really matters
Too late, my time has come
Sends shivers down my spine, body's aching all the time
Goodbye everybody, I've got to go
Gotta leave you all behind and face the truth
Mama ooo (anyway the wind blows) I don't want to die
I sometimes wish I'd never been born at all
I see a little silhouetto of a man
Scaramouch, scaramouch - will you do the fandango
Thunderbolt and lightning very very frightening me
Gallileo, gallileo, gallileo, gallileo,
Gallileo figaro magnifico
But I'm just a poor boy and nobody loves me
(He's just a poor boy from a poor family)
(Spare him his life from this monstrosity)
Easy come easy go will you let me go
(Bismillah no we will not let you go) let him go
(Bismillah, we will not let you go) let him go
(Bismillah, we will not let you go) let me go
(Will not let you go) let me go (never)
(Never let you go) let me go, never let me go ooo
No, no, no, no, no, no, no
Oh mama mia, mama mia, mama mia let me go
Beelzebub has a devil put aside for me - for me - for me
So you think you can stone me and spit in my eye
So you think you can love me and leave me to die
Oh baby can't do this to me baby
Just gotta get out just gotta get right outta here
Ooh yeah, ooh yeah, nothing really matters, anyone can see
Nothing really matters nothing really matters to me
Anyway the wind blows...
****
Crazy lyrics to wake up with! The part that stuck with me ever since, were the lines... just gotta get out just gotta get right outta here... and nothing really matters to me.
There are times when I feel like I just need to leave. Create a new life for myself. Somehow. Someway. Especially since, I feel like not much really matters to me, anymore.
God has shown me who cares, and who does not. He's revealed truth to me. Truth that I prayed about. And, prayed for.
I must admit, that the only things that matters to me, are those I love and care about. Jesus, of course! And, God's Word, the Bible.
This made me think of Psalm 119:49-50, "Remember the word unto thy servant, upon which thou hast caused me to hope. This is my comfort in my affliction: for thy word hath quickened me."
Yes, my hope comes from my Lord. Jesus Christ. Who gives me grace, to make it through each day.
Jesus, who loved me and gave Himself for me, before I was ever born. Thank You, Lord. For loving me and dying on a wooden cross, for my sin, and for the sin of all who will believe.
Until next time...
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