Monday, January 16, 2012

Uncomfortable...

A few days ago, I received a phone call from one of my newer neighbours who live on the same floor as I do.  K is the wife of a fellow realtor of mine, T. 

Not this past year, but the year before, we sat beside each other at my real estate board's gala dinner (previously called our Christmas party!).  At the time, she let me know they would be moving into my building, although at the time, they weren't sure which unit they would occupy.  Little did any of us know, that they would become my neighbours on my floor!

In any case, being fairly new to our building, they thought it would be nice for those of us on our floor to get to know each other.  Personally, I thought this was a good idea, because even though I have lived here almost five and a half (5 1/2) years, I don't really know some of my neighbours.

T & K attempted to set up a progressive dinner for last December.

I say attempted, because it seemed that not everyone could participate, at that time, with everyone's focus on Christmas and their preparations.  Instead, it was decided that the progressive dinner would be held Jan 14th, 2012.

Since there are 12 (4 - 1 bedroom, 4 - 2 bedroom and 4 - 3 bedroom) units on our floor, we realized that not everyone would host a portion of the dinner.  Especially, if there was a large crowd, for not everyone could fit comfortably in the one (1) bedroom units.

As it turned out, some people would be away in Florida for the winter, while some others said couldn't participate.  But, some of us were happy to join in the fun!

The newer people, who had newly decorated their units decided they would like to host, along with some people who occupy three (3) bedroom units.  This way, we would progressively move through our meal, visiting in 1, 2 and 3 bedroom units.

When I first received my notice, I contacted K and T, letting them know I would contribut to dessert, for the group.  They were happy to hear from me.  After that, others volunteered to contribute either food for the dinner, or a location to host the segment in, or both.

During last week, I received a phone call from K, who let me know that I didn't need to contribute dessert for the dinner, because the couple who were hosting the location had decided to provide for that portion of the meal, as well.  At first, I was a bit disappointed, but after some thought, and while still on the phone with K, I decided I would contribute to appetizers, instead. 

K thought this was a good idea, especially since we were to begin with appetizers at her home!

By the time Saturday, January 14th arrived, I was feeling sick in my heart.  During Friday evening and all throughout Saturday morning, I had felt rather uneasy.

My thoughts had been about how almost everyone involved in the progressive dinner, would be couples.  Not only was I feeling sad about not having a spouse to participate with me, but I was feeling like I might be a fifth (5th) wheel, once again.

I telephoned K.  As I brought up this subject, she began to chuckle, letting me know that she heard the same thing from her mom, after her dad died.  I assured her that it is a normal feeling to have, especially for those who are grieving. 

After all, even though I have church family who are my friends, there is only one (1) couple who have had me visit with them, as a couple, since being widowed.  None of the rest of my friend couples, have included me in gatherings.

K assured me I wouldn't feel out of place, and let me know that another widow would be participating.  N, who lives across the hall from me, in the unit my widow friend K used to occupy.

Before hanging up, we discussed the appropriate dress for the occasion.  While not formal, it would be a comfy-dressy occasion.

Since I have more to say, I'll tell you, tomorrow.


Until next time...

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