Thursday, January 5, 2012

The Ball Drops...

If you read yesterday's Life with Lynnie (LwL) entry, you'll know that while attending a New Year's Eve celebration at a small church, here in Windsor, Ontario, I experienced an eye problem that was directly attributed to a lighting situation.

As I mentioned yesterday, when the pastor was speaking, she realized that the lighting was affecting my eye, so she asked the lighting fellow to shut off the special light.  I am sure it was plainly obvious, because I was seated near where she was speaking, and had my eye covered so that the light from the ballroom lamp that was like a revolving spotlight, wouldn't cause me pain or damage my eye.

Phew!  Was I thankful!

After the pastor finished speaking, a quartet of young women, comprised of the pastor's daughters, sang for us.  It was lovely!

Just as more music was to begin, the lighting fellow restarted the revolving lamp that was so blinding to my eye.  In addition, he also dimmed the regular lighting, so that the only light in the room came from the revolving spotlights!

Believe me when I say I was shocked!

In addition to being shocked, I was also confused as to why he would do this.  After all, the pastor had just asked him a few minutes earlier, to shut off that lamp.

Of course, when the pastor didn't speak up once again, with direction to restore the normal lighting, I had to reconsider my time there.  It only took seconds to realize that I just could not stay in that environment.

Leaning over, I whispered to my friend R that while I would like to have stayed, I would have to leave.  We said our goodbyes and wished each other Happy New Year.

As I approached the back of the sanctuary, another friend approached me.  M and I had not had a chance to talk, because we had been seated in different areas, but she approached me.  M asked me to stay, but I explained that I could not, due to the possible repercussions from the lighting.

Again, I said goodbyes, first to my friend M, and then to one of the church members who joined M and I near the door.

As I left and drove home, I found myself rather upset.  I wondered why the lighting fellow would do that, especially since he knew I had an eye problem affected by the lighting. 

Then, I found myself wondering why the pastor had not spoken up, once again.  After all, she was aware of my problem with the lighting.

Not wanting to be angry, I gave myself a shake emotionally and spiritually.  I forgave them... all.
Why would I need to do this?  Well, part of me was very hurt and frustrated.  Had someone there been in a wheelchair, would the group have made that person walk?  Absolutely not!  It hurt me to feel that once again, God had shown me that the reality of life is, that no one truly cares about other people.  Even for the plight of the disabled.

Okay, so I don't always look disabled to others.  But, the truth is, I am... partially disabled.

I am sincerely grateful that God has shown me His way.  He has told me repeatedly, to not put my faith in man.  Not just in various verses in His Word, the Bible, but also in real life.  I keep reminding Him that I am well aware that there truly is no love for me, from anyone other than Him, so He can stop proving this to me.

Still, it happens over and over again, in my life.  I'm grateful for my Lord and His love for me, because the truth is, the only person I can totally trust, is Him.  Same applies for you, my friend.

When I arrived home, it was past 11:30 p.m.  Yup, there I was.  Alone, on New Year's Eve.  Just what I hadn't wanted to happen.  Nevertheless, it was God's will, otherwise it wouldn't have happened that way.

After watching the ball drop at midnight, and crying my heart out, I placed the large roast in my slow cooker, along with the other ingredients and seasonings I use, and went to bed for the first (1st) time in 2012.

Until next time...

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