Friday, December 17, 2010

A Mile In My Shoes...

Yesterday, was a stressful day.  Yes, I have been very busy, but that's not why it was a stressful day.

My heart goes out to my fellow church sister S, whose husband B died; yesterday, was his funeral.

When I approached S at B's casket, I hugged her and told her how sorry I was hearing of B's death.  S replied to my comment, saying, "Me, too."

Now, to most people this wouldn't sound strange, but to me, it made my heart jump, for that is exactly what I said to people, when they made comments to me about being sorry hearing of Gordon's death. 

When I told S I had been praying for her and would continue doing so, she told me that she has now joined a select group, of which I am a member.  She commented that I know what she is going through, for I've already gone through it.  Unfortunately, S is now walking a mile in my shoes.

Gone through it, I have.  In fact, I am still going 'through it'.  Grief, is not easy.  Grief, is not kind.  My heart broke for S.

The heartbreaking part of B's funeral yesterday, is the fact that S will begin her suffering, now.

Yes, we are all happy B is in heaven with Jesus, just as we were all happy Gordon went to be in heaven with Jesus, when he died. 

Being happy, grateful and even joyful about knowing our loved ones are with our Lord is truly a blessing.  The only trouble is, life goes on.  And, on...and on...and on.

Life as a widow is extremely lonely.  No one, not even the best of friends, can fill the gap that was filled by a loving spouse.

Watching and hearing S speak with others yesterday, reminded me of where I was just 14 months ago.  I could hardly contain my tears.

Oh my friends, especially my Christian friends have been a wonderful support to me.  I am truly grateful for the love and support I have received from them.  The worst part for S, will probably be battling with being lonely, also.

From experience, I can tell you that no matter how busy a widow is, loneliness is still a major issue.

If you've been reading Life with Lynnie (LwL), you will realize that I have literally been rushed off my feet, these last few weeks, yet I am still burdened, feeling lonely.

In my opinion, keeping busy does not overcome the feeling of being lonely.  I can be surrounded by people, busy as can be, and still feel lonely.

My prayer for S, is that she receive support and love from her family, including her step-children.  Not having support like this, I believe has contributed to my problem of feeling lonely.  After all, everyone needs to feel loved.

We are only human.  Love is part of life.  When love is absent or rare in a person's life, like mine, it makes me wonder what on earth God could ever use me for.

In my opinion, rejection, lack of love and understanding could easily lead a person to dispair.  I'm grateful that I am well grounded with my Lord, for I know that the only true love I have is from Him.

Yes, I am grateful for the love my friends show me, for I know that the love I receive from them, comes not only from them, themselves, but also from God, for my friends who have been so loving and supportive, are Christian.  Thank You, Lord for blessing me.

Now, it's my turn to show love and support to all three (3) of my friends who have recently become widows.  Two (2) at least, are saved Christians. 

May God bless and provide healing for each friend who is experiencing the heartbreak of grief.

Until next time...

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