Friday, April 16, 2010

Sitting Down?!

Wow! Did I ever have a good sleep, last night! No, I didn't sleep in, but I got a truly restful sleep and feel wonderful, today!

First thing this morning, my phone rang. It was my friend W; she was so happy, she just had to call and tell me her good news. If you read yesterday's entry, you'll know that W was in tremendous pain and was suffering, greatly. Last evening, I prayed with W over the phone; she told me she felt the pain weakening. Well, the good news was that the pain subsided overnight and she too, got a wonderful sleep for the first time in many days. Praise God! Thank You, Jesus!

Another caller invited me to go out for coffee this morning. H & her husband A, meet with me and a few other realtor/friends on a semi-regular basis; previously we met more often, but lately, we (as a group) have been meeting less often. It was nice of H to call, for we hadn't spoken in a while, since both of us had been busy. I politely refused, not because I didn't want to go and have quality time with my friend/co-worker H, but rather, because I have so much paperwork to do, it isn't funny. We agreed to get together for a sort of office/coffee meeting after I get my income tax done.

Remember, I did laundry instead of working on my income tax info?! Also, I previously mentioned that I need to get my bookkeeping done for my real estate business, so I could remit my GST for the first quarter of 2010 (Jan. - Mar.).

Today was work hard on paperwork day! No, I still have not gotten all my info together for income tax, but at least I have it sorted, now.

Please don't be shocked. Are you sitting down? I actually got all my bookkeeping done and my GST remitted to the government, today! Praise God! Thank You, Jesus! One down and one 'biggie' to go! Hopefully, things will come together, next week.

I should mention that my neighbour/friend K and I spoke this week, several times. This past Monday (Apr. 12th) was the twenty-third (23rd) anniversary of her husband L's death. It was my time to be a support for her.

At first, K didn't really want to tell me how she was feeling, because she was afraid it would upset me, since I am still in heavy grief for Gordon. I assured her that I needed to be a friend to her, to help in any way I could. Hopefully, I was able to be of good support to K; she said on FaceBook that I was. Thank You, Lord, that I could be of help to someone else, even in my time of grief.

Your Word tells us that sometimes we suffer so that we can help others. I find that regularly, I am able to be of support to others when they are hurting. So, I thank You, Father for this. You told us that all things work together for good for those who love You, to those who are the called according to Your purpose; so, we know that You do make something good come out of every trial. Help me to always be Your obedient servant.

I must say that since last Sunday, when the Holy Spirit convicted me of my sin of unforgiveness towards God (in the sense of not being grateful I had Gordon in my life, for a time), I have felt less stressed. Feeling like I'm more able to cope. I've actually been able to think of memories with him, without falling apart. Hopefully, this will continue.

Of course, I have to admit that those eight (8) days around Gordon's and my wedding anniversary and Easter, with five (5) days of 'firsts', made me feel like I was totally overwhelmed; it was like being in crisis. So, I am thankful for feeling improved. Yes, I miss Gordon; I always will. I love him; I always will. Nothing will change that. I have still cried, but not as often. I thank You, Father, for always providing for me.

What K did show me was that my grief may never end. I must try to deal with my loss as best I can. It doesn't feel as 'shocking' anymore. I just feel lonely. Broken. After realizing that twenty-three years later K is still suffering grief, I realized that she, like me, truly loved her husband. She told me her husband was truly her soulmate; I feel the same about Gordon. I've come to the conclusion that people who don't understand grief, haven't deeply loved, for I've come to the realization that those who deeply love, deeply grieve. Oh well, life goes on.

After defrosting, heating and savouring my homemade chili for dinner, I wrapped a house-warming gift for my friend W's daughter K. You may recall that K's husband D, walked out and left K with five (5) young children to raise on her own. She recently moved to a rental home and wanted to celebrate all the help and prayer she received, so she decided it would be nice to have everyone who helped/prayed come visit.

Afterwards, I went to a funeral home, because a fellow realtor/friend's Mother died. The place was crowded; people were everywhere. I quickly gave my condolences and headed for home.

There doesn't seem to be much on television, tonight. I read my Bible for a while, relaxed and talked with the Lord for a while.

Tomorrow, I'm having company for dinner. Then, on Sunday, I'm having my daughter P and her family for dinner, also. This weekend will be rather busy for me, especially since I am also scheduled to do an 'Open House' this Sunday!

Since tomorrow will be a very busy day for me and I have a lot to do, I think I will bid you farewell, just for tonight.

Until next time...