It's early in the day for me to post an entry, but since I will shortly be going out with friends C and K for dinner, to Mexican Town Restaurant in Detroit, MI, USA, I thought I'd write, early.
Besides, I've already had a very full day! As with most days when I work at home, I did my usual calls and computer work. However, today, I had more work than normal.
In addition, I made my call to Canada Revenue Agency (CRA) regarding Gordon's and my income tax. Good Lord! Thank You for helping me!
After waiting to speak with one CRA Rep, I had to wait again, to speak with another Rep, who specialized in 'Final Tax Returns for Deceased People'. At first, I thought it was a pain having to do all that waiting. However, it's a good thing I called! I was given information that I desperately needed and didn't know it.
Firstly, I was told that Gordon's final deceased return could not be e-filed. Hmmm. This didn't sound right to me, because my friend C, whose wife also died last year, took their taxes to a tax preparer, who e-filed both their returns. Still, who wants trouble? Not me!
Secondly, I was informed that the Rep could talk with me about my file, but not Gordon's. Here we go again, I thought! They have me on file as the person to speak with, but because of Gordon's death, they need a copy of his will, court documents and a 'proof of death' certificate on file or no conversation could take place.
I told the Rep that our Federal Government has all that on file. I was told that their department did not have it on file, only another branch. Be still my heart. I could feel myself becoming overwhelmed, once again.
This means much more work for me, because since his taxes cannot be e-filed, I must submit a paper file to CRA; if I'm going to do this for Gordon, then I may as well do it for myself, too. This way, both income tax forms can be submitted together, along with the legal paperwork that I must submit to them, regarding Gordon's death.
In addition, I must fax them or send a letter along with the info they require and a request to know what T's they have on file, to date.
I've already decided that EVERYTHING is going together, in one envelope, so it can't be said that anything was missing. And, I will take it directly to CRA's Windsor office, downtown and get a stamped receipt for the package.
Give me a break! I spent much time digging through paperwork that I had accumulated regarding Gordon's death and estate. Then, I arranged to pick up Gordon's will that was still at the lawyer's office; it was apparently not valid, for it had been written shortly before we married and without us realizing it, once we married, it was no longer valid, for my name had changed. Still, CRA wants a copy of it.
Is it any wonder that the first year after the death of a loved one, that people feel not only grief, but stress? Walk a mile in my shoes. Then again, I really hope you won't have to, for I wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy. This whole experience has given me new empathy for anyone who has lost a spouse.
With regards to grief and depression, is it any wonder that while some people repeatedly tell you to 'get over it' and 'get on with your life', there are circumstances that rise to the occasion that just won't allow a person to do this. Not just the emotional 'firsts', but actual 'garbage of life' that perpetually rises from the sewer or landfill of life.
While I am in the process of 'cooling down' and trying to relax my mind, it isn't hard to see why those heartbreaking feelings arise. Hopefully, when our taxes are submitted, this one stressful time, will end. Probably just in time for another to begin. After all, it is the year of 'firsts'.
Well, I must get ready to go for dinner across the river. My friend K, called me earlier to make sure I was up for it, for she saw on Facebook that I was feeling rather awful, again. I'll say again what I said to her, "No way will I cancel out! I need to have some time to relax with my friends and try to keep my sanity! I won't miss it, for the world!"
So, it'll have to be tomorrow when I tell you about my delicious escape.